Just one is enough

I was thinking of trying this again. I was writing much more last year but I have slowed. I reread much of what was there and deleted it. Not that I regret what was written, just that I feel its time to start anew.

It occurred to me today that if there is just one person that is standing behind you in all that you do, its more than enough. I thought of this as I was driving. Which, it seems that's all I ever do. Anyhow, its a good time to think, reflect.

I'm nearly forty-two years old and I have just recently learned this lesson, learned it for real. I have made a life built on the principle that I am alone. Today I know for a fact that I am not. I was probably never totally alone before. I know that. Its just that now, I know for sure.

That alone feeling had quite a bit to do with me and how I held myself apart from others. For as far back as I can recall I have been afraid of anything that resembled love on any level. I have walked away from friends and lovers because of it. Fear. Such bullshit.

There have been a great number of changes in my life in the last three years. Some tragic and some wonderful. Each of those things has created a path to where I am now. In this fabulous place where I know that no matter what I am up against, when I look back over my shoulder to see if I am facing this villain alone. I see my best friend. The person who laughs at all my jokes, good and bad, who makes me smile, and, who lets me know that as I continue on this path, he is standing behind me.